Schrödinger's Donut

The precise nature of the hole in the centre of a donut has baffled the best minds in physics for centuries. Is the hole part of the donut, or is it a completely separate entity?

Donut Hole Decay (DHD) was discovered by Erwin Schrödinger and later explained by Steven Hawking.

Einstein and the Speed of Donuts

In his famous 1905 thought experiment, Einstein wrote, ‘Imagine a radioactive donut emitting photons.

The light produced by this donut will completely fill the donut hole, thus defining the shape of the hole.

Now, what would happen if you accelerated this light-producing donut beyond the speed of light?

Well, then the donut would move away from the light in its hole. In other words, the donut and its hole would separate!"

According to Einstein, this absurd situation, where a donut is located in one region of space and its hole in another, was just too silly for the universe to put up with. Thus Einstien reasoned the universe must have an in-built restriction on the speed of donuts.

“The speed of light is the maximum velocity at which a donut can travel through space.” - 'The Relative Donut' Albert Einstein, 1905.

Einstien theorized a donut hole cannot exist without the presence of a donut. Take away the donut, and the donut hole collapses to zero.

The Bohr Donut

On the other side of the argument was the great quantum physics, Neils Bohr.

In this 1912 Paper, Non-Euclidean Geometry and The 3-Torus Donut, Bohr wrote, "That which occupies the donut hole is not materially or spatially part of the donut. The donut and the donut hole are entirely independent entities."

Bohr was fully aware this concept is difficult to grasp, but as he famously said, "One must be mindful that at the level of the donut, nature is free to contradict common sense notions on the human plane.

Schrödinger and the Copenhagen Interpretation

In the 1930s, the greatest minds in physics met in the Danish capital, Copenhagen. They gattered in a attempt thrash out the donut hole conundrum once and for all.

Danish pastries were famous in Europe. Thus Copenhagen was the ideal location to delve into the donut.

The best bakers in the city worked overtime, producing great donut piles for the scientists to examine.

Schrödinger and his mathematical proof of something to do with donuts and donut holes - a masterstroke of insight that leading quantum physicists still pretend to understand.

The Austrian-Irish physicist, Erwin Schrödinger, was instrumental in formulating what came to be known as the Copenhagen Interpretation of Donuts. This model suggests the existence of a donut hole depends on the presence of a donut, and yet a donut and its hole can be separated in space and time, so long as they are entangled.

“The donut hole is simultaneously part of the donut and not part of the donut.” - Erwin Schrödinger

Einstein objected. He mocked the entangled donut proposal, even going so far as to call it, “A Spooky Donut at a Distance.”

But Schrödinger hit back, producing a lengthy mathematical formula so complex that nobody could understand, and thus nobody could refute.

Hawking Donut Radiation

Schrödinger discovered Donut Hole Decay (DHD). Incremental shrinkage of donut holes was eventally explained by the British physicist, Steven Hawking.

Quantum Physics suggests empty space is not actually empty at all, but a bubbling sea of sub-atomic donuts that pop in and out of existence almost instantaniously. This foaming broth of Virtual Donuts materialize then vanish so quickly that their presence was initially thought to be undetectable, and inconsequential. Virtual Donuts manifest in pairs: a positive donut, and its negative counterpart, the anti-donut, or the donut hole.

Steven Hawking noted if a virtual donut pair pops into existence at the boundary (the Event Horizon) of a larger doughy donut and its hole, then the virtual donut may be sucked into the solid donut hole, thus causing the hole to shrink, or radiate away.

The Infinite, Universal Donut

Microwave background radiation, a relic left behind by the Big Bang, consists of hot and cold regions that fill the known universe. These regions can be thought of as donuts and anti-donuts, and together they create the scafolding on which the large structures in the universe are bulit.

Evidence suggests the Earth is donut shaped, but donut entanglement creates the illusion of it being a sphere.

The universe itself is likely donut shaped. So what then lies outside of the universe, in its own donut hole? Perhaps everything and nothing, all at once.

While all Donuts have fixed, finite dimentions, their holes are infinite. From out of the nothingness of the Donut hole, our donut shaped Universe was inevitably forced into existence, for no hole can exist without there being an entity to which it may be a hole.

The Big Bang which brought our Universe into being is, therefore, the logical consequence of the donut hole and it's infinite non-being.

Erwin Schrödinger, along with other great minds, have together expanded our knowlege of the donut hole. But there is still a great deal more to discover. Recent theories suggest there is only one donut hole in existence, and this singular hole is common to all donuts at once. Other mathematical computations claim the donut hole is nothing more than a donut going backwards through time. However, this theoretical proposal is yet to be confirmed through experimentation. The more we learn about the donut hole, the more it fascinates!